Waaaaay back in 1999 or 2000, which is an eternity in interwebz years, I came across this hilarious online series that took old kung-fu movies and re-dubbed them with hip-hop theme music and rap star voice-overs. The result, enough laughs to fill your pants full of last nights moo-goo-gai-pan. I’ve been loosely looking for it lately and finally found it using the very intuitive google search “old kung-fu movies dubbed over with rap star voice overs and hip hop” buried at the bottom of the third page. The title of the series, Kung Faux. They made it into a TV series at one point in 2003, but I’ve only ever seen it online on heavy.com or dubtitled.com. Somebody uploaded the first episode “The ill-master” to youtube in three parts, I’ve embedded the first part below, links to the other two parts of the episode are listed below the embedded player. Enjoy bitches.
I saw a headline on CNN.com today that reminded me of a Daily Show segment called “The Question Mark” which originally aired in the Fall of 2006. First-off, this segment, as are many of the Daily Show segments, was genius, it covers the use of a question mark by Fox News, CNN, and other main-stream media shriekers of bullshit as a ridiculous ploy to raise alarm without any consequences of being unethical. Today’s headline on the CNN.com front page was “Is your money safe in the bank?”, click here for full article. Are these assholes so desperate for ratings that they would try to drum up a basic fear from the depression era? In the article CNN.com reports:
The FDIC maintains that not one depositor has lost a single cent of insured funds since 1934 as a result of a bank failure
Experts say you shouldn’t panic.
Experts may say don’t panic, but CNN says “RUN FOR THE HILLS, HIDE YOUR MONEY IN THE MATTRESS, AND RAPE YOUR CATS…. THE BANKS ARE FAILING!!!”. What a bunch of asshole, fuck-nut, douchebags. Please check out the segment below, you won’t be disappointed.
While I’m in full-on Bush bashing mode, check out the video below from the Chapelle Show. This is one of my favorite bits from the show, and even though it is several years old, it is pure gold. Have fun watching bitches!
What? Huh? Oil? Who said something about oil bitch, are you cookin?
I mentioned this in the comments of yesterday’s post about Iran, I was able to track down a youtube clip of Bushy-poo making his infamous “Fool me Once” blunder. I can see Bush singing like Homer in the shower:
I am so smart… S.M.R.T, I am so smart
And Homer’s little song and dance… (sorry for the shitty video, it’s the only one I could find).
Here’s the scene; you are in a pub smashed out of your melon, you retire to the bathroom to take a piss, you stumble up to the mirror, and realize that you are one good looking sumbitch (even though your eyes are mostly pasted shut, your hair is fucked up, you have food on your face and shirt, you are drooling a little, and there is piss dribble on the front of your pants). In this situation, you have your beer goggles on. Now extrapolate that out to the bar where you are now willing to hook up with anything that moves including a hole in the leather bar stool.Â
It turns out that the good folks at Manchester University in the UK came up with a formula in 2005 that describes the beer goggle effect as a result of several factors (click here for full article):
Researchers at Manchester University say while beauty is in the eye of the beer-holder, the amount of alcohol consumed is not the only factor.
Additional factors include the level of light in the pub or club, the drinker’s own eyesight and the room’s smokiness.
The distance between two people is also a factor.
As a wise, ok not so much wise but typically drunk and funny, guy I knew in college used to say:
Beauty is but a light-switch away…
I leave you with an example from our good friends at Broken Lizard, it is a scene from their latest movie Beerfest, enjoy:
The first TD poll results are in, Thundarr the Barbarian was the most popular cartoon from your childhood by a landslide, winning by a count of 2 to 1 to 1 to 1 to 1. Full disclosure, I voted for my old friend Thundarr. I blame apathy for the parity in the results, that and the skew towards cartoons from MY childhood memory and not necessarily yours. If you’ve never heard of Thundarr the Barbarian, then I blame you for it’s low ratings, subsequent cancelling, and therefore the ruining of my Saturday mornings, thanks a lot tools. Check out the clip below for the standard intro to Thundarr, how can you not like this gem? A close second for me was Superfriends followed by Bugs. I’ve added a Family Guy clip of the Smurfs that cracks me up as well.
I saw this on youtube the other day, I think it’s been around for years, but holy shit wait until you see the kid in orange after 30 seconds or so, he is sick.
If you haven’t seen Superbad yet, get to the store today because it was just released on DVD, don’t stop on go or for any children or old people (and you’re an incredible loser). But, don’t just take my word for it (even though it is impeccable), check out the link below. My favorite quote from the clip:
Yeah, while you guys are at Dartmouth, I’ll be over at State where the girls are half as smart and thus twice as likely to felate me.
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