Dec 17 2008
Archive for the 'funny' Category
Dec 12 2008
Even more Sumthin Sumthin
Sumthin Sumthin #8 and #9 are now posted on the Sumthin Sumthin page. Get some. Now. Seriously, what the fuck are you waiting for?
Dec 06 2008
Photo Caption Contest #29
Photo caption time. It’s hard to come up with a proper adjective to describe the unbelievable beauty of this photo. I’m a little embarrassed, but I cried from the beauty. Click on the little blue button on the lower left side of the picture to bring up the Photocrank menu (or you can leave your caption in the comments if you are still into the old school method). Have fun. Peace.
Dec 03 2008
Random Shit
When I say random shit, I mean random shit that trickles through my thick skull, not like randomly shitting your pants during meetings or randomly popping a squat in the aisles of your local Best Buy. This set of random shit is what happens when you are bored and working out (from this morning).
- If you rip a huuuuge fart on a treadmill, your mind thinks you are crop-dusting, but you’re not. In fact it doesn’t matter how hard you crank up the treadmill, you can’t outrun it. Oh yeah, it also pisses off the old guy on the treadmill next to you.
- I saw Avril Lavigne in a video this morning. She is looking like a total slut. Sweet.
- The Santa Claus in both Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer and Frosty the Snowman is a fucking asshole. Especially in Rudolph.
- Are republicans represented by red because of the huge redneck base? Are democrats represented by blue because they are huge baby blue ball-babies?
- Sublime’s 40 oz Freedom is a great work-out album. 80’s pop, not so much.
Nov 26 2008
More Sumthin Sumthin
Sumthin Sumthin #6 and #7 are now posted on the Sumthin Sumthin page. Go get some… and then some more.
Nov 19 2008
Sumthin Sumthin
We’ve added a new feature to Total Diatribe. It is a comic strip called “Sumthin Sumthin”, which ironically is completely and totally about sumthin…. and sumthin. There is a new page dedicated to Sumthin Sumthin, the link is at the top right of this page. There are 4 strips to date. Later assholes.
Nov 18 2008
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Best. Animated. gif. EVER.
I’m speechless, with a big ass eating grin on my face. I found this gem stumbling @ megasizzle. Enjoy.
Nov 14 2008
Photo Caption Contest #28
Photo caption time. Click on the little blue button on the lower left side of the picture to bring up the Photocrank menu (or you can leave your caption in the comments if you are still into the old school method). Have fun. Peace.
Oct 26 2008
Who declared national redneck day?
So I’m with my 2 year old boy at a local indoor playground today. There are a million of these types of places around with the inflatable bounce rooms and slides and shit. I’m generally in a meh mood because I’m even at the place, when I start noticing the other clientelle. I’ve been at this place at least a dozen times, and the other folks were normally in the same socio-demographic group that I’m a member of, you know, entitled assholes. Today was different. The first clue that something was amiss was when I caught glimpse of a bright yellow mullet out of the corner of my eyes. I had to give a double take, the dude was in his 50’s had a bleach blonde mullet, and get this. Feathered Bangs! They were so impressive that they deserved to be capitalized. He even had a long handled comb in his back pocket. Then I start noticing middle and high school aged crackers running all over the place and jumping around on the apparatus (and scaring the shit outta my boy). Typically there are 1 to 7 year olds there, this was something else. By this time my redneck senses were going ape-shit. Shiny light would blind me from keychains attached to belt-loops, I saw not one but two neck tatoos, and a pod of rednecks changed the channel on the TV in the parents area from Football to NASCAR… WTF!! For some context, I grew up among the rednecks in rural Pennsylvania, only we didn’t call them rednecks, in PA they were called hicks. Same difference. However, I can speak their language. I’m struggling if I want my boy to be fluent in redneck or not. I think it’s inevitable, so I should embrace it. I already purchased him a rusty Chevey Blazer with ultra-patriotic bumper stickers. So he’s got that going for him… which is nice.
Oct 24 2008
Photo Caption Contest #26
Photo caption time. Click on the little blue button on the lower left side of the picture to bring up the Photocrank menu (or you can leave your caption in the comments if you are still into the old school method). Have fun. Peace.
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