The following quote from CNN.com completely encapsulates how fucking stupid our asshole president is…  new estimates are that the war will cost 2.7 trillion dollars and thousands and thousands of lives… nuff said:

U.S. President George W. Bush claimed Wednesday that he had no regrets about the decision to invade Iraq and topple Saddam Hussein in 2003 and reiterated his determination to force Iran to halt its nuclear program.

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Or at least heading in that direction. I’m referring of course to our civilization. The answer to the question of “What caused the fall of Rome” has no real answer, however it had some dominant factors like population in decline, incompetent and corrupt political system, and economic crisis… we are fitting the bill fairly nicely. For me it is those factors plus the unbelievable shit that we as a population get into. For example, check out this disturbing motherfucking shit out:

I’m speechless and sick to my stomach.

Then there is shit like this:

What the fuck is wrong with these people…

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New Mexico Governor Bill Richardson declared his allegiance to Obama on Friday, and he made the following statement on Sunday (click here for full article):

I am very loyal to the Clintons. I served under President Clinton. But I served well. And I served the country well. And he gave me that opportunity,” Richardson told “Fox News Sunday.”

“But you know … it shouldn’t just be Bush, Clinton, Bush, Clinton,” he said.

I’m no expert, but maybe Richardson should have said “I HAD been loyal to Clinton’s”, you see Merriam-Webster defines loyal as:

1: unswerving in allegiance: as a: faithful in allegiance to one’s lawful sovereign or government b: faithful to a private person to whom fidelity is due c: faithful to a cause, ideal, custom, institution, or product

2: showing loyalty

At any rate, I really don’t give a fuck about Richardson’s opinion, and neither did most Democrats judging by his primary numbers. However, show some backbone dude. All of this minutia bullshit and bickering has fragmented your party and you guys are just fighting over the most inane details and scraps of power and influence that I’ve decided to label the entire party with the “pussy” moniker.

AND THEN come the ridiculous comments from the campaigns like Carville saying Richardson is like Judas, and Obama’s campaign likened Bill Clinton to McCarthyism when they took a quote out of context and claimed Clinton was questioning his patriotism. I don’t know about you, but I don’t respect whiny pussies, and I don’t know how I could vote for somebody from the PP (Pussy Party) at this point. On the other hand, I don’t exactly see eye-to-eye with crazy horse McCain either. I guess we’re just fucked for another 4 years, the good news is we’re getting used to it…. way to go Washington.

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I’m just narcissistic enough to google myself every once and a while. You should give it a try, everybody is doing it… it’ll make you feel good. Or, in my case, make you feel insignificant, either way you’ll feel something. I googled my real name (Beatrix Kiddo) and was rewarded with references of my father as well as an NASA astronaut. That’s cool right? Ok, so I’m not rockstar famous, baaallooow me.

Then I tried a different search. I searched for billymac. Guess what? There is a billymac.com! And holy fucking shit he’s a rockstar? Welllllll… he at least has a thing called “Billy Mac and his all-star party band”. Well shit. That’s got “SUCK” written all over it. To top it off, he’s got a theme album all about golf. Fucking Golf? Yep, he has a Golf album, do you remember in the early 80’s a little theme album called “Pac-Man Fever“? Now that’s how you do it, with songs like “Do the Donkey Kong” and “Ode to a Centipede”, that shit is hot. Not with songs like “Tee it up” and “Hit the ball”… I’ve officially found the lamest dude on the fucking planet, and it’s fucking ME!

FUCK! Okay, Okay, calm down billymac, calm down motherfucker, just take your pills!

So this song “Hit the Ball”… apparently it’s about golf. The lyrics are literally:

Hit the ball… go find it.

Hit the ball… go find it again.

Hit the ball… go find it.

Hit the ball… go find it again.

Oh my dear fucking lord…. that is brilliant! He’s fucking captured the game of golf in song! Don’t believe me? Check this out:

Sometimes it doesn’t pay to google yourself…

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I read an article today about how Andy Pettitte (a baseball player for those of you who don’t give a shit about baseball or sports) was really sorry that he took HGH and then lied about how many times he took it.  I’m not going to wax philosophically about whether or not congress should be involved in sports drug cases (they shouldn’t) but I laugh every time I read or see these ding-dong’s on TV crying and apologizing with typically no other real consequences.  The worst may be a social shunning for a period of time, but shit, Bonds is still fucking around isn’t he.  Try this exercise on for size, it always cracks me up.  Take any of these cases (either performance enhancing or recreational drugs) and spin the perspective of an average Joe at your place of work.  In the case of Pettitte, he called a press conference in a tent, behind third base for Christ sakes, with his manager AND teammates Jeter, Rivera, and Posada there to support him.  They all hugged and cried and felt really good about themselves after the revelation (click here for full article).

Now feature this.  This guy you know that works the 2nd shift at your plant gets busted smoking weed, let’s call him Joey Bologna.  He calls a press conference behind line #4 with a couple of his shift buddies, his supervisor, and his union rep.  They all cry and apologize to each other and then Joey reads from a prepared statement about how he smoked weed only once or twice because he had a nagging knee injury.  Then he gets to go back to work.  That’s what really happens right?  In your dreams fuck-face.   Joey gets the shit-can and he and his buddies retire to Joey’s rusted-out van to burn one and bitch about how shitty their jobs are.  And then Joey can’t find another job because the assholes that just fired him won’t give a stoner a reference.

These prima-donna athletes fucking piss me off…

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An upset customer shot at a Hooters restaurant in Knoxville, Tennessee yesterday after there was contention with his bill.  Unfortunately, this waste of skin killed a patron and seriously injured a manager.  Click here for full story on CNN.com.  What I don’t get is how this dude can be so upset to commit murder over a bar tab?  Especially after staring at orange and white cleavage and tight buns?  Sure, be an asshole and start a fight, but to be chicken-shit enough to fire your gun into the place from the outside?  I hope this ass-clown gets his in jail, and bubba literally breaks him in.

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Dr. Jan Adams, douchebag, tool… douche-tool.  Why would you go on national live television to say you will not talk about an event publicly (and thus surprising the host Larry King)?  The answer, because you’re a fucking ass-wad.  He could have written a letter, sent an email, used semaphore, had a private conversation, basically, he could have communicated to Larry King his position in a myriad of ways but he chose to put himself on TV.  This asshole probably thinks he’s doing the noble thing and will look good respecting the wishes of the West family, sure, but do it off the air.  The real answer, because YOU WANTED TO BE ON TV, attention whore.

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It turns out that a couple of prominent Obama supporters were influential in the rejection of Steven Colbert’s name from the primary ballots in South Carolina.  According to a CNN.com article:

At least one member of the executive council, who requested anonymity, told CNN he felt “pressured” by former State Superintendent of Education Inez Tenenbaum to oppose placing Colbert on the ballot.

Tenenbaum, who ran for U.S. Senate in 2004, is a high-profile supporter of Obama. Her endorsement of Obama in April was touted by the campaign in May, and she has appeared at several Obama campaign events, including the opening of a campaign headquarters this summer.

Booooooo South Carolina, and Booooooo the executive council, this just cements my opinion that Obama is a tool (even though it was his supporters and not the man, I still think he is a tool by association).  Special interests in politics is out of control in this country.

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Merriam-Webster defines douchebag as:

slang : an unattractive or offensive person

I define douchebag as this guy:

It turns out that this colossal prick has created quite the buzz after he was spurned on an interaction on match.com with the following email:

I think you forgot how this works. You hit on me, and therefore have to impress ME and pass MY criteria and standards - not vice versa. 6 pictures of just your head and your inability to answer a simple question lets me know one thing. You are not in shape. I am a trainer on the side, in fact, I am heading to the gym in 26 minutes!

So next time you meet a guy of my caliber, instead of trying to turn it around, just get to the gym! I will even give you one free training session, so you don’t blow it with the next 8.9 on Hot or Not, Ivy League grad, Mensa member, can bench/squat/leg press over 1200 lbs., has had lunch with the secretary of defense, has an MBA from the top school in the country, lives in a Buckhead high rise, drives a Beemer convertible, has been in 14 major motion pictures, was in Jezebel’s Best dressed, etc. Oh, that is right, there aren’t any more of those!

This guy fucking rules, for more douchebaggery check out his site, it is a good example of how to be a tool.

I give him this official badge:

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