I’ve seen this particular meme all over the place, basically it is to sum up “you” with a song (this tracks back to Simply Curious). This one was a no-brainer for me, it’s gotta be Cooky Puss by the Beasties. In a unrelated post, Sadcox called me mean the other day in his comments whilst tagging me with a different meme. BTW I totally resemble that remark as well as a no-talent ass-clown, the problem is he tagged with a meme that I have to link to 5 posts about myself and my family etc. The rules are:
Link One: must be about family
Link Two: must be about friends
Link Three: must be about yourself
Link Four: must be about something you love
Link Five: can be anything you choose
My first thought, “FUCK, I don’t write about my family and shit”, then I remembered my stories from the road posts, all five requirements can be met with one story. Basically most of my writing is bitching about other people and all of the shit that happens around me, so that’s all I got, except one post about pissing out of my ass (and nobody wants to relive that one so I’m not even linking it). I’m also a non-conformist and have major problems with authority, so I’m not going to tag anybody with this meme, that’s just how I roll.
As a person I used to work with once said, “You have a head chock full of useless knowledge”, then she called me an asshole. Anyway, I typically pepper most of my posts with random movie references, some fairly obscure, like “Beatrix Kiddo” in the previous post, and some lame-ass (like “I’ll be back” or “There can be only one” or “Me so horny”), but if you put all three of those together, it kinda sounds like a conversation I had with my wife last week. Anywho, I’m going to count them up, lame-ass or not, and put a counter at the bottom of each post. Try to figure out what they are, or not, what-the-fuck-ever, what am I here to entertain you?
I’m just narcissistic enough to google myself every once and a while. You should give it a try, everybody is doing it… it’ll make you feel good. Or, in my case, make you feel insignificant, either way you’ll feel something. I googled my real name (Beatrix Kiddo) and was rewarded with references of my father as well as an NASA astronaut. That’s cool right? Ok, so I’m not rockstar famous, baaallooow me.
Then I tried a different search. I searched for billymac. Guess what? There is a billymac.com! And holy fucking shit he’s a rockstar? Welllllll… he at least has a thing called “Billy Mac and his all-star party band”. Well shit. That’s got “SUCK” written all over it. To top it off, he’s got a theme album all about golf. Fucking Golf? Yep, he has a Golf album, do you remember in the early 80’s a little theme album called “Pac-Man Fever“? Now that’s how you do it, with songs like “Do the Donkey Kong” and “Ode to a Centipede”, that shit is hot. Not with songs like “Tee it up” and “Hit the ball”… I’ve officially found the lamest dude on the fucking planet, and it’s fucking ME!
FUCK! Okay, Okay, calm down billymac, calm down motherfucker, just take your pills!
So this song “Hit the Ball”… apparently it’s about golf. The lyrics are literally:
Hit the ball… go find it.
Hit the ball… go find it again.
Hit the ball… go find it.
Hit the ball… go find it again.
Oh my dear fucking lord…. that is brilliant! He’s fucking captured the game of golf in song! Don’t believe me? Check this out:
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